Hello non-elite builders of ROBLOXia who have a deep yearning to learn more about wood grain, WoodReviewer here, it is that time again: when I have no idea what place to review but still want to get a blog post out. You all know what that means: Time to spin toe EBR Wheel of Woodshame and find a random place with bad wood grain. Today’s victim is Electiz, with his place Cape Cod. As always with EBR places, it goes not take long to find bad wood grain.

This was right by spawn. As it is easy to see, the posts that hold up the rope that hold up the lantern have bad wood grain. The grain should be vertical. Surprisingly, though, the chairs and table both had correct wood grain.

Continuing around the outside of the house, this basket had improper wood grain, with the vertical planks having horizontal wood grain rather than vertical wood grain. Same on the door to the green house; the vertical pieces had horizontal wood grain rather than the correct vertical wood grain.

Moving around the house, I snuck into some bushes to better surprise the wood grain when I saw it. Again, the vertical boards were not vertical.

Still, atleast on the window in the background, if all the vertical pieces are horizontal, then atleast the horizontal pieces should have horizontal wood grain. Right? Of course not; this is EBR we’re talking about. However, it is worth noting atleast the white siding is correct. That’s something.

Moving towards the inside of the house I again saw the post I saw at the beginning. Again, it had improper wood grain. Also, the ropes that held up the lanterns were directly over a fire. This will probably end badly, as with the fact the wooden fence is not withing the proper 3 foot empty zone around fire pits, but I guess if turn signals are optional in Massachusetts, then so is fire safety.

One last note before I go inside, the horizontal supports for the white fence are bad.

Heading inside of the house, the first thing I noticed was that the vertical pieces on the door frame and door were incorrect, having horizontal wood grain, not vertical.

Inside the house at the dining room table, the chairs legs had bad wood grain. This is not surprising anymore. What is surprising was that the table legs did not have bad wood grain. This shows that the creator did not purposely use bad wood grain, but rather just did not care about it.

Moving inside the house, this small Bloxy Cola table had some improper wood grain. While I acknowledge it is a unions and that this shape is hard to make, the wood grain should atleast go along the long side of the oval, not the short length.

Moving upstairs to the master bedroom, most of the furniture had improper wood grain. The shelves and desk, for example, had wood grain that did not stretch between the supports, but perpendicular to it. For the desk especially, this is bad if any significant weight is put on it.

Last up for the inside was the headboards. Well, not the last piece of bad wood grain; there were plenty. Just the last I’m showing. The head boards have vertical wood grain, rather than horizontal wood grain that connects to the vertical posts. This is a major issue as the bed is located at the top of an overlook. So if the headboards break and your pillow falls over the edge you need to talk downstairs to get it. And no one should walk down stairs while sleepy.

So, how does this place hold up? To typical EBR standards. Granted that bar is very low due to the wood grain holding the bar falling and causing the bar to sink into the ground, it is still a bar nonetheless. Unfortunately, my bar is higher and is held up with proper wood grain on with proper reinforcement braces, so it does not pass it. I hope one day EBR introduces a proper standard to have good wood grain, but until then all I can do is sit down, watch the sunset, and complain that these beach chairs and little table have bad wood grain.

Fix them. They look terrible.